I have been reflecting on the song, “King of the World” by Natalie Grant. This song is my faith story. For so many years, I put God and my faith in a box. I kept this box tightly shut and opened it only when I absolutely needed to. These days, that box is never shut. I openly live out my faith and my strong belief and need for God everyday, unapologetically. There is a link to this song below, check it out!
I have learned the struggle of learning to grow in my faith. I have struggled with praising God during the valleys. It is easy to praise God during the peaks. It is not easy to praise during our storms. It is hard. It is really hard. But, you guys, it is growth when you reach a point where you can praise and worship the King of Kings even when are in the middle of a storm. God never ensures that our Christian life will be easy and that we will not face challenges. He gives us him to lean on and press into the Word during those storms. Some of worst moments have been fought while still praising God and worshipping. Did I want to praise God in that moment, probably not at first, but I pressed in and knew that I needed God to fight my battles. I tried fighting my storms on my own and eh, not really working out for me.
My spiritual breakthrough happened when I let God lead and I quit caring what everyone else thinks. I quit leaning on the input from others and started seeking God. I no longer pushed my faith in a box. I am unapologetically Christian. I am led by God in my every day. I am human and I perfectly, imperfect but I am his hot mess and for his constant GRACE, I am so grateful!
My kids have been back to school for over a week now. They are happy to be back at school. They are not fond of wearing masks pretty much all day but they are adjusting. They are grateful to see their friends and to simply be kids. I am grateful as well. We are creatures of habit and it is nice to have a set schedule rather than the living in limbo like we have all been doing since March. I have noticed my heart was heavy in the last couple of months. I slipped into a deep hole. I let the craziness of 2020 get the best of me. I lost who I was and what I stand for. The truth of the situation is…I saw myself headed down this path. I allowed outwardly circumstances to control me- including my thoughts. I quit working on my book that I was so excited about. My husband and kids did not get the best side of me. I was more than overwhelmed with a situation that I could not control. I have said it once, I will say it again…I just want to see and hug my loved ones.
You guys, COVID sucks, like in the most basic non-political stance ever…it has created mass chaos in it’s wake. I have grandparents, parents, siblings and nieces and nephews that I just want to see and hug! I want to celebrate my daughter’s fifteenth birthday that was in APRIL! I want to walk in a building without a mask. I want to see a person smiling as they walk by not lose their mind because a breach in a six foot space has been infiltrated. I want people to simply show common decency towards others. I prefer to not see folks lose their minds over hoarding thirteen packages of toliet paper. I would prefer to see Americans supporting Americans regardless of political view or socio-economic status. For Pete’s sake, something has to give. This should not be first time news, BUT… YOU can disagree with another’s opinion without blaring profanities and falling short of waging civil war against the other person. It is ok to have a differing opinion. It is healthy to have different opinions.
I am the proud aunt of a police officer and you better believe that this amazing young man is prayed for on the daily in this house. My nephew is serving others day in and out. He works hard in good times and in bad to ensure the safety of those who has taken an oath to serve and protect. For those who do not believe in backing the blue, when trouble comes calling and it quite possibly will at some point and time, who will be on the receiving in of your first call? Truly serving others is certainly something that we as humans need to get in the business of doing. And let me me go ahead and clear up any misinformation, are there bad cops? Yep, but there are also bad doctors, teachers, truck drivers- you can seriously fill in the blank with any profession you can think of.
Let’s get more in the business of supporting and loving on each other rather than putting others down. I can be as guilty as the next person with the comparison shame game. It is something that I need to work on. I, personally need to press in to loving on others more.
Did you see my note above about a book? I am so stinking excited about this amazing opportunity. Writing has always been my greatest outlet. This book is my heart from cover to cover. I have been drafting and editting over the last couple of months. I am closing in on my deadline to get something to my publisher. If you could see the pages they would show my tears, my smile, my heart. Stay tuned for upcoming information!
Updates: Brody got baptized (see pic below)! We have 5 baby kittens. They are pretty stinking cute and I am NOT a cat person at all. Twins are in middle school. Brogan is enjoying running cross country. We are excited to attend his first meet this Thursday. Kinsley is planning on trying out for the school play that is a movie now thanks to COVID. We are about to get started on home repairs thanks to some substantial storm damage from the Summer. I will post pics of our progress. That’s it for now. Stay safe, be humble and exhibit kindness to others.
As I am writing this, I am on a journey to put God first and others second and myself last.
The greatest season is right around the corner. I love Fall. I love pumpkin spice, boots, falling leaves and cool mornings with a cup of coffee.